Nevermind

     As I approach my 57th birthday this year I am aware of feeling really okay with it all. It's not a landmark birthday of course (that's three years away) but I am noticing that a kind of peace is filtering into my life. Sure there are still things that make me upset: the quality of my children's education, the squandering of our tax dollars by various governments, the myriad of injustices that pervade our planet; I could go on and on. ( Don't get me started on the "building materials" that are piling up on our property!)  I just don't feel at the mercy of my desires anymore. Chicken or fish, green gloves or blue, white wine or red, latte or mocha....I really don't mind one way or another. And that is not to say that I don't care; I care about many things: my family, my friends, other people, animals, the world, current issues. I'd like to paint more, read more, write more poetry. My thought though is that I am just getting older and as my husband says "Not smalling the sweat stuff."
     Maybe it's "old lady apathy" or maybe not. I think what is happening is that I am recognizing that there are so many things in our world that are not important. I would like to focus on those things that are: my children, the world that they are inheriting, the memories that they will carry with them into adulthood and independence. I can't change the many things that aren't right in our world. But I can smile at my children, listen to what they have to say and remind them by what I say and do that they are loved, truly loved.