Precious

 

     There is no sweeter compliment that you can receive as a parent than when someone lets you know that your child is special to them. Whether by word or deed a person conveys to you that your child has made an impact on their life, you then feel something powerful: pride, validation, encouragement or even joy.  That is how I came to be sitting in my car in tears because a fellow volunteer at one of the thrift stores our eldest daughter helps at, gifted her with a wonderfully sweet memento, something precious that her mother had given her. I was so touched by her gesture. It is, like her, extraordinary.
     This also happens when one of your relatives makes a date to hang out with one of your kids or they invite them to spend time at their home halfway across the country. You cannot help but feel that you have done something right; your child has turned out okay, whether because of you or in spite of you!?
     Parenting these days is not easy. The word parenting did not even exist when I was a child, which tells you how old I am! And the old adage about it taking a village was never truer than it is now. There is so much pressure from so many different sources; it is relentless and often overwhelming. So when kind, wise and wonderful people, whether related to you or not, take an interest in your children, it is a special kind of compliment. It says, "You have raised a person I like to be around." And that these days, can be something amazing.....Thank you Ida!

Talk

     As a parent of a special needs child, the need for support is great but is not often available. The only folks who understand it seems, are parents of other additional needs children. We congregate at Challenger baseball games, Special Olympic practises, the odd specially arranged coffee here and there but the times that we can actually sit down for a few hours and share are few and far between. (Never was a cliche more exact!) When those times do occur they are hugely cathartic, much fun and very beneficial. It is never better than being with someone or a couple of someones who just get it; no explanation required, no question too silly or inappropriate, no remark misunderstood. There is just a feeling of being accepted and understood that defies explanation. You are with your peeps.
     Such was my experience the other day and although we did not solve the problems of the world, I certainly feel as though my load is a little lighter. There is something about being with other mothers (and fathers) that increases my sense of hope and gives me a feeling that everything will be alright, regardless of how things are going that day. More importantly, the opportunity for me to connect with other parents means that our eldest daughter is connecting with friends and acquaintances with whom she can be herself. What a gift for us both! There is no better feeling than knowing that you can be yourself; there is no pretense, no judgement, you are you and that is more than okay. Thanks friends!