re·sil·ience
/rəˈzilyəns/
noun
- 1.the capacity to recover quickly from difficulties; toughness."the often remarkable resilience of so many British institutions"
- 2.the ability of a substance or object to spring back into shape; elasticity."nylon is excellent in wearability and resilience
I recently re-read a post from Mindshift entitled "How to Help Teenage Girls Reframe Anxiety and Strengthen Resilience". It is a very valuable read which was passed on to me by another mother. With anxiety and depression being diagnosed in so much of our population, is it any wonder that our sons and daughters are suffering with these spirit crushing disorders. As I have noted in the past, I too have experienced dysthymia or chronic low-grade depression since my teenage years with depression hitting me in my late thirties. This occurred after a keenly felt pregnancy loss. And although we talk about these things more than we used to, the stigma of mental health issues remains. I hesitate to write these words even though I must.
We humans do not deal well with loss and change yet they are a crucial part of the necessary and unrelenting rhythm of daily life. Teenagers' brains are not yet fully developed and therefore are extremely vulnerable to emotional extremes. Add to that the full on, unending assault of social media into every crack and crevice of our already stressed out lives and you have a recipe for disaster. Of course some losses are comparatively small; a failed exam, a friendship gone wrong, an unexpected lay off make life hard. Still more difficult losses like the divorce of parents, a pet death or moving out of town are not given sufficient time to be processed. We rush through grief like we rush through life. Healing is ignored and significant losses are then overwhelming and complicated.
The recent suicide attempt of a young friend makes me weep with remorse. Is there something I could have done to offer support? How do we connect with others when we are pushed to isolation by pandemic guidelines? How do we help each other right now? These questions will haunt me as the answers are largely unknown. All we can do, when we get the chance, is to be present and to listen. And then listen some more. I hope that we can all find ourselves to be resilient. I pray that we can help each other find hope.
