Membership

      Our daughter tried to renew her membership at the gym this week. She took in the completed form, her confirmation of assistance document and her government issued photo identification. She informed the man at the desk that she wished to renew her membership and that she had a disability. The man told her that her ID was expired and that therefore renewal was not possible then and because she did not know better, she believed him. He insisted that she pay a drop-in fee and so she did. And then she worked out. When she got home later she was upset. She had not felt heard, had felt dismissed and when she found out that her ID did not expire until her birthday, she felt misled. Also there was that drop-in fee. So today our daughter went back to the gym, with the same form and the same identification and she renewed her membership. The woman at the desk heard her story, understood her frustration and completed the necessary task. She made us smile and made my daughter see that advocating for yourself is not hard to do, but it takes time, patience and commitment. 
     Unfortunately, so many episodes like this one are encountered everyday by our daughter, her friends and peers. They are small incidents but when piled up together they can create a sense that the world is a hard, misunderstanding place to live, where problems cannot be tackled alone. And sometimes they can't, especially when you have an intellectual disability. But as our daughter readies herself to move into Harmony later this year, she is learning that there are times when she can go it alone and times when support will be necessary. And getting to know one from the other will be a lifelong journey, one step at a time....