Two of our friends had a family member die this week. Although the deaths were expected, it seems that there is always the shock of the end. There is no good time to die, at least for the people left behind. These two individuals had cancer and so there was probably some degree of pain and suffering. For some people it is a relief that their loved one no longer suffers. My friend said though that he was disappointed not to be able to have one last chance to talk. His sibling had been given so much morphine that it was impossible to connect. My other friend hadn't been able to get back in time to see his relative before he died.
I know that when someone dies I am reminded of how important it is to keep up to date with my "I love yous". That was the gift of working at hospice; I was reminded daily. Now my work is primarily as a mother, wife, farmer and secretary---so death is not as prevalent. In the 90's television show "Early Edition" (that we have discovered on Netflix) the main character Gary, receives tomorrow's newspaper today and so he works to undo the tragedies he reads about in the paper and thus change the news. Isn't that what saying "I love you" as often and as meaningfully as possible to the important people in your life all about? It can change people's lives: for the better when it's said, and meant and not so when it's never spoken, never felt.
The holiday season is pressing down on us and so it's supposed be a hard time to be sad. Of course, many people are down-hearted at this time of year, for so many different reasons. I think when you have small children you cannot help but feel the infectious joy that this time of year brings to some kids. If you have faith and the story of Christmas resonates for you then you too are touched by the wonder of this special time. Many people though are tired or sick or broke or missing someone and so this time of year is especially hard.
If you are able to reach out, by whatever means possible, I say do it. It will make a difference. Whether it's connecting with an estranged family member or donating a few extra cans of tuna to the Food Bank; a box of chocolates for your mail carrier or a note to a far-away friend; some warm socks tucked in the coat drive for the homeless or even a smile for a stranger on the street, big or small it all makes a difference. And don't forget those "I love yous"--- even when you pass by the mirror. We could all use a little more love, couldn't we?
I know that when someone dies I am reminded of how important it is to keep up to date with my "I love yous". That was the gift of working at hospice; I was reminded daily. Now my work is primarily as a mother, wife, farmer and secretary---so death is not as prevalent. In the 90's television show "Early Edition" (that we have discovered on Netflix) the main character Gary, receives tomorrow's newspaper today and so he works to undo the tragedies he reads about in the paper and thus change the news. Isn't that what saying "I love you" as often and as meaningfully as possible to the important people in your life all about? It can change people's lives: for the better when it's said, and meant and not so when it's never spoken, never felt.
The holiday season is pressing down on us and so it's supposed be a hard time to be sad. Of course, many people are down-hearted at this time of year, for so many different reasons. I think when you have small children you cannot help but feel the infectious joy that this time of year brings to some kids. If you have faith and the story of Christmas resonates for you then you too are touched by the wonder of this special time. Many people though are tired or sick or broke or missing someone and so this time of year is especially hard.
If you are able to reach out, by whatever means possible, I say do it. It will make a difference. Whether it's connecting with an estranged family member or donating a few extra cans of tuna to the Food Bank; a box of chocolates for your mail carrier or a note to a far-away friend; some warm socks tucked in the coat drive for the homeless or even a smile for a stranger on the street, big or small it all makes a difference. And don't forget those "I love yous"--- even when you pass by the mirror. We could all use a little more love, couldn't we?
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